1. Acknowledge that something terrible happened. It is not your imagination! You were a victim of childhood sexual abuse. Do not try to deal with it on your own. Share your memories and emotions with a loved one.
2. Allow yourself to recognise your feelings. There may be sadness, anger, fear, guilt, and shame. Reject those feelings that are destructive to yourself such as guilt and shame. You were the victim.
3. Find a support group and or therapist. Discuss the abuse as thoroughly as you are comfortable with. In time you will be able to discuss everything. Suppressed memories fester. Expose the hurt and allow it to heal.
4. Do NOT blame yourself! Your actions as a child were in no way to blame for what happened to you. If others try to blame you then dump them in the rubbish bin of your life.
5. If there was any part of the abuse that was pleasurable to you (more attention, gifts, bribes, feelings of being cared about) Do NOT feel guilty. You were being used and any good feelings were there to coerce you.
6. Forgive yourself. It is your choice whether or not you chose to forgive the abuser/s. Never feel pressurised to forgive those that abused you.
7. Do allow yourself to be angry! You have every right to be angry. Take this anger out in a safe way. Punch hell out of a pillow, a punchbag or a soft chair. Do not punch walls (that hurts you)or people who care about you (that hurts them).
8. Do not allow the past to control you. You control your present and the choices you make affect your future. The abuse happened. It cannot be undone. You have the chance to make your future a better place.
9. Love yourself. You are a wonderful unique human being. What happened to you is in no way a reflection of who you are. It might have affected your life to date, but was in no way your fault. Love yourself and allow yourself to be loved.
10. Never forget that you are not alone. Reach out to someone if you feel low. Support and help is there. There are numerous online ways to chat with fellow victims. You are not a freak. The abusers are the freaks.