Boy To Man

Boy To Man

Little boy plays happily,in the fields with friends

long drawn out dreamy days

anxiety an unknown enemy

tired boy on a long journey, friends a long way away,

functioning only as memories

in a new Antipodean reality

clever boy alone, sadly contemplating an accent,

hating a colour, choking

constructing the iron boundary

chunky kid, supposedly smart, successful in the elder’s eyes,

smarts from colouful taunts...

keen brain but heavy heart

young man on the outer, alone in a bookish haven

returning on a northern route,

inner struggle getting harder

shy young man, boyish in looks, piece of pretty paper proclaims

intelligence, commodity unseen

unwanted, slave to musty books

little boy, old young man uncertain, angst filled trek,

nowhere greeting him fast

tries to feel while he can

carefully constructed armour hiding the softness inside

under sheets of uncertainty,

greyness hiding vivid colour.

Who I Was Born To Be - My Version

I've never felt free,
To bare my heart open wide,
To allow you to see, all that I can be,
Fear and doubt always there at my side.

I was never that boy, nor that man,
Who could give of himself, be so free
But I hope that one day soon
I'll be all I was born to be.

I once opened the door, to let myself be free
I was ill prepared and too naive
Fell too fast and too hard. Maybe soon,
My time will come again.

I look back over my years, lived in fear
Lived in doubt. Always sure you'd not want
And cast me aside, with no thought, I was
Not who I was born to be.

Now I look in your eyes, Your arms open wide
And I Still feel my fear, my own stupid doubt.
I hope that you'll see, it's not you but it's me
Give me time, I'll set my self free.

Forget restraints of time and of space,
Nothing is impossible, life is a race
I'll do all that I can, forget fears and doubts,
At your side I know now, I am sure, no doubts
I can be who I was born to be....